Thich Nhat Hanh began the activism that would eventually lead to his exile with the founding of the School of Youth Social Services in Saigon, a relief organization that rebuilt villages bombed as a result of the Vietnam War. It also helped to set up schools and medical centers and resettle families. During this time, he traveled to the United States frequently to study and teach at Columbia University as well as promote peace. He spoke to many people about peace and urged Martin Luther King to publicly oppose the war. (King nominated him for a Nobel Peace Prize in 1967.) Exiled from Vietnam in 1973, he established the Order of Interbeing, a monastic and lay group teaching mindfulness practice, and has subsequently founded monastic and practice centers around the world. He makes his home in Plum Village Monastery in the south of France, where he has established also the Unified Buddhist Church.
Thich Nhat Hanh’s main teaching is a practice of mindfulness adapted to Western sensibilities. From his home in France, he travels internationally to speak and give retreats, and he is the author of more than 100 books. He also continues to be active in the peace movement, sponsoring retreats for Israelis and Palestinians, and giving speeches urging non-violent solutions. In 2005 he conducted a peace walk in Los Angeles that was attended by many people. That same year, Nhat Hanh was allowed to return to Vietnam, with a subsequent trip in 2007.
Thich Nhat Hanh is beloved not only for his speaking and teaching, but his many books, which include, Peace is Every Step: The Path of Mindfulness in Everyday Life, Being Peace, Living Buddha, Living Christ, Fragrant Palm Leaves: Journals, 1962-1966, No Death, No Fear, and Anger, to name a few.
“If in our daily life we can smile, if we can be peaceful and happy, not only we, but everyone will profit from it. If we really know how to live, what better way to start the day than with a smile? Our smile affirms our awareness and determination to live in peace and joy. The source of a true smile is an awakened mind.” This quote from Nhat Hanh’s book Peace is Every Step affirms the guiding principles of mindfulness, his teachings, and life at Plum Village. There, and at his other centers, followers of Nhat Hanh engage in the activities of day to day life much the same as in the outer world, but they everything is done in the spirit of mindfulness. In practicing this together as a community, mindfulness becomes more joyous and relaxed.
An epic feature film about the life of the Buddha, based on Thich Nhat Hanh’s book, Old Path, White Clouds, is in production, and on September 11, 2006, Nhat Hanh and the Dalai Lama spoke with the Hollywood community about the need to present the film so that the audience’s consciousness will be uplifted and turn to mindfulness.
While listening, you know that your listening must be of a good quality to solve the communication problem in relationship. When you speak, you tell the deepest kind of truth, using loving speech, the kind of speech the other person can understand and accept.
Calm down and look deeply
I propose Friday evening for two reasons. First, you are still hurt, and if you begin discussing it now, it may be too risky. You might say things that will make the situation worse. From now until Friday evening, you can practice looking deeply into the nature of your suffering, and the other person can also. While driving the car, he might ask himself, "What is so serious? Why did she get so upset? There must be a reason." While driving, you will also have a chance to look deeply into it. Before Friday night, one or both of you may see the root of the problem and be able to tell each other and apologize. Then on Friday night, you can have a cup of tea together and enjoy each other. If you make an appointment, you will both have time to calm down and look deeply. This is the practice of meditation. Meditation is to calm ourselves and to look deeply into the nature of our suffering.
Using loving speech and good quailty listening
When Friday night comes, if the suffering hasn't been transformed, you will be able to practice the art of Avalokiteshvara (Guanyin) - one person expressing herself, while the other person listens deeply. When you speak, you tell the deepest kind of truth, using loving speech, the kind of speech the other person can understand and accept. While listening, you know that your listening must be of a good quality to relieve the other person of his suffering and solve the communication problems in the relationship. A second reason for waiting until Friday is that when you neutralize that feeling on Friday evening, you have Saturday and Sunday to enjoy being together.