This is my first public blog and I wonder if anyone will read it?  It feels odd to put my feelings out into the huge mysterious world wide web. 

As my eyes burn from reading so much internet articles about healing, love and the magical I wonder why I feel held back in life.  Last night I had a dream that I missed my flight because I didn't know when it was and I had lost my passport.  It is indicitve of my lost feelings. 

I ponder if this is normal.  I have raging doubts about my choices in life in every aspect from relationships to money to school and work.  I worry about having made wrong choices.

I also wonder if it is normal to have such few friends when I have lived in this city for so long.  I have a few best friends, childhood friends, few casual friends, my boyfriend, sister and mom and thats about it. I have a hard time befriending people beyond the aquiantance level. 

I think also that reading so much 'self help' is not so self helping.  It amounts to too much information in my head and conflicting ideas.

Maybe I need to chill out on the worrying and figure out how to have more fun in my life.

If anyone has experienced or is experiencing the same thing, care to comment.

Thanks for reading.
Hopefully my entries get happier.
Haha